Still learning (Broken Part 2)

I'm still learning. 

I'm learning that it is a lot easier to see the benefits of brokenness when you are not the one who is broken. 

As a physical therapist, I am fully aware of the rehab process.  Several months before I broke my wrist my friend's boyfriend broke his arm.  Once a week or so I'd run into them and I'd ask how his rehab was going.  Inevitably, before he said much, I had a hold of his arm assessing his motion, doing a few mobilizations, a little soft tissue work, etc.   I like to call it "therapizing".  :) At any rate, even though he asked for my help, he didn't like it. He's a tough dude, so he would never tell me to stop, but we therapists get pretty good at reading faces. He was hurting. Did I stop? Nope. Why?  Because I knew it was part of the process. I knew that even though it may have felt like I was needlessly inflicting pain, I was actually helping him regain full function. I knew it hurt him, but because I understand why it hurt and the long term outcome, I kept pushing. Well, I ran into him the other day and of course we had a good laugh about our broken wrists and the fact he was "safe" from my therapizing since I am on the injured list.  I was explaining to him how hard it has been for me to let people help me. He laughed and said "Yeah, cause you're used to being the person that's doing the hurting, not the one that's hurt!" I laughed.  As I walked away I began to realize there was a lot of truth behind that statement.  I realized that when I am the one in charge, and I'm inflicting the pain, it's ok. Because I know that it is necessary and that it is beneficial. But it is a whole different story when I am the one who is broken and I don't get to be in control of where I am going and how I am getting there or the pain experienced along the way. Not being in control is not easy. Do I trust the One who IS in control? Do I trust that His "therapizing" is actually what I need to be fully functional? 

I am learning that asking for help needs to be a part of my life- Even when my needs aren't as obvious as a broken wrist. Allowing others to help me isn't just for my benefit. We need each other.

I asked my 3 year old nephew if he would help me carry a bag up the stairs and open the door for me. He proudly agreed with every inch of his three year old frame beaming at the thought of being needed. I made a big deal about it. I told him how nice it is that he's helping me out and how he was already becoming a gentleman. Well, he is really taking this responsibility seriously. This weekend he saw me buttoning my jacket and he said, "Jessie, be careful, you have a broken arm! You need me to help you cause you don't want to hurt your arm!" He's very concerned for me, such a sweet boy.  So I let him help me button my jacket. Then he said, "Aunt Jessie, after your broken arm is better you will always still need me to help you." I smiled. "You are right little buddy", I said, "I will always need you to help me." From the mouth of babes......

I'm still learning.