Like a tree planted by water...

"His purpose is that I depend on Him and His power now. It is that I see Him walking on the waves. No shore in sight. No success, no goal. Just the absolute certainty that it is all right because I see him walking on the sea. It is the process,not the end that is glorifying to God."  Oswald Chambers

So often I am focused on  the goal.  This often means that my confidence is in myself and whether or not I reach the shore.  Oh sure, I see Jesus walking on the water and that's cool and all.  It's nice to have the company, especially when I've been out at sea a long time or when the scary storms begin to brew.  But I've got this.  My eyes are focused on the goal and I spend most every moment analyzing and pondering how I'm going to get my shipwrecked broken up raft to shore and still be one piece.  I start out confident I can do it.  After all, I've got an solid oar, a half full bottle of water, a positive disposition, and my dad's stubbornness. :) 

So I grab my oar and I paddle just as hard as I can, feeling emboldened when I begin to develop blisters on my hands.  If only the rest of the world was willing to work as hard as me, they'd get to shore too.  I paddle harder.  I tire out and stop to breathe.  My eyesight is limited and so is my strength.   As far as I can see in every direction there's ocean.  I realize I have no idea if I was paddling in the right direction.  And as the waves lap against my raft pushing me back I realize in a matter of minutes, I'm likely back to where I started.  I'm frustrated with myself.  If only I could remember how to figure out which way was north.   I see Jesus walking on the sea and look at Him long enough to tell Him how lame it is that it's so hot and windy out here, and how it sure would be nice to have someone on this raft paddling with me.  I reach my hands into the water to cool off and the salt burns my blistered palms.  Figures. Oh well.  I decide that I just need a good night's rest, then I will be able to make some real progress tomorrow.  My mind begins to race.  Maybe if I change my hand hold or the angle I'm holding the paddle.....

I drink my last drip of clean water from my bottle and stare longingly at the water that's surrounding me.  I'm so  thirsty, and I know I need water to survive.  Knowing full well that drinking this salt water would kill me.  I take a small sip, then I spit it out.  I look again to Jesus.  Angrily, I tell Him how thirsty I am.  I yell at Him about how stupid it is that ocean water is salty.  I tell Him about how much it stinks that I can't see the shore and I don't know which way to go.   I'll never make it.  I cry.

I stifle my tears.  Crying gets you no closer to the goal.  Suck it up and figure it out.   Forget being positive. I am bitter and jaded and even more determined to do this on my own. This stupid storm.  I'll show it!  I begin to rack my brain.  There must be someway I can figure this out.   I'm sure I've read a survivors tale in one of my Backpacker's magazines about how to survive a shipwreck.  How long was it that a human can survive without water? 

So I continue on in my voyage.  Getting nowhere.  One moment striving, battling, taking no prisoners.  Futile efforts.  The next moment, realizing my inherent weaknesses, paralyzed by fear, curled up in a ball on the floor.  Ineffective.  I'm left confused.  Worn out.  Tossed about by the waves.  Jaded.  Wondering why this is happening to me.  And slowly but quite surely, dying. 

Then Jesus says, "Come".

In the story of Peter walking on the water, there comes a point where fear has taken over the disciples and Jesus tells Peter to, "Come".   Peter obeys.  He steps out of the security of the boat with his confidence resting fully in Jesus and he walks on water.  HE WALKS ON WATER!

We all know what happens next.  Peter looks around, he sees the storm all about him and his confidence shifts.  No longer is he focused on the confidence of the Lord, but rather is focused on his confidence (or lack thereof).  Peter's no dummy.  Peter was a fisherman before he became a "fisher of men".   So he was quite familiar with the reckless nature of the sea.   And Peter was scared.  He was no longer floating along with misplaced confidence in the false security of the boat.   He was a mere human in an illogical circumstance.  It didn't take much thought for him to realize that he was no match for the rage of the sea.  And he sank.

I think Peter and I would have gotten along splendidly.  His passion for Jesus ran as deep as his pride and insecurities.  But he did have confidence in the Lord!  So much so that when He saw Jesus walking on the waves, Peter was actually the one who suggested he walk to Jesus... on the water!  It's when his confidence switched to himself and what he could and could not do that he began to sink. 

When my confidence rests in my own abilities, one of two things happen.  I either become prideful and stubborn.   Determined to figure it out on my own.  Or I become dejected and defeated knowing my significant inadequacies.  Believing the battle's already lost.    

"Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose trust is the Lord.  He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit."  (Jeremiah 17:7-8)

There is a quiet confidence, a cheerful courage, a hopeful and calm spirit that presides in the life  of one whose confidence is in the Lord.  It's the ability to continue walking on the water even when the storm is raging around you.  It's the ability to continue bearing fruit in the midst of a drought.  It's leaning on Him when your legs simply cannot hold you up any longer.  It's depending on Him and His power now.  Trusting the process.  Without regard to where the shore is.  Knowing with quiet confidence that it is all right because you see Him walking on the sea.

How does one rest in this place of confidence?  "He is like a tree planted by water that sends out its roots by the stream." Plant yourself by the stream of life.  Sink your roots deep into the moisture rich ground that is the character of God.  And watch as He provides you with the confidence that He will provide the exact nutrients you need to grow stronger and healthier and to bear much, much fruit.